The Life and Times of a High Desert River

thinking of summer…. so I dug out my journals to see what I could find that would ignite a memory of warmer days out of doors…. this is a revision from an entry in the summer of 1991, all rivers and fish are depicted as they were and shall remain anonymous

In July, summer steps in with authority, dispelling all of June’s fickle weather. A summer rhythm is established that will wear and tire into perpetuity. And it all starts one evening – July 11th. The day lingers in heat, the sun hangs all afternoon, and only reluctantly gives way to the horizon. Sunset now requires patience.

The river snakes across the valley, meandering so tightly in places that only a thin bridge of soil separates the channel from itself. Here, a cast either forward or back will fall onto productive fishing water. This evening I go about my usual routine, wandering the banks, waiting for the sun to set, watching for the first fish of evening to rise up and sip in a passing bug. In June, the Pale Morning Duns dominate and are standard evening fare along with the waning Brachycentrus caddis emergence. But something is different late this afternoon. The earliest bugs and fish of the evening are nowhere to be seen. So I continue wandering upriver, crossing into new water and ever hopeful that the heat of the day has only pushed things back a bit and not shut it down entirely.

Farther upriver, I come across a confluence where a smaller side channel re-enters the main channel. Since the main channel is not easily crossed here, I am forced to wander up the side channel. The water in the side channel is thigh deep with willows lining both banks. In places, the upstream wade is like walking through a hallway – completely cut off from the wide open valley beyond. Water slides silently though a maze of bright green aquatic vegetation, waving in the soft, shallow currents. The long filaments feel cool and soft brushing against my legs — maybe a tickle, more like a massage.

I don’t remember if I saw the fish or the bugs first. Small caddis, some sort of micro-caddis that I once knew the genus of, but it doesn’t matter: small and brown. They are either returning to lay eggs or are slow to take flight. They float for a bit before taking wing, providing opportunities to waiting fish below. I quickly swap out flies for an oversized Elk Hair that I crudely clip down to size. The head of a large brown trout tips up to a passing caddis. Lying in a small, open slot between the aquatic vegetation, the cast is not easy, hampered even more by the willows lining the banks. But the first cast falls perfectly – the results of daily casting in difficult water for well over a month now. The fly floats softly into the open slot just as the head appears to gently pull it in and down. The brown trout is a summer best – 18” head to tail. The caddis get thicker and the first crickets start to ratchet up their evening song. The thigh deep water continues on and each fish is a seeming carbon copy of the last. I reach the top of the side channel, where it leaves the main channel, with one more fish topping 21 inches just as night takes over and the day concludes. Seven fish in total, nothing smaller than 18 inches and almost every large, rising fish spotted and cast to was caught.

The caddis hatch would last two weeks and never would approach the magic of the first night. Then, one night, just as it had appeared, it was gone, only to be replaced by a tricorythodes hatch and spinner fall the following morning. That was when the side channel became a routine staple each and every morning I had away from work. By 9 am, the first spinners would be on the water. And while the side channel may not have been the most productive water from a numbers or even size standpoint, the charm was its small size, shallow, weedy water, technical casting requirements, and, ultimately, one fish in particular. Where the river pushed under the willows, and further under the bank, a fish would show some mornings and not the other. Its rise was only the slightest of dimples, better heard as a soft kiss rather than seen. At first glance, it was easily dismissed as a juvenile fish. But after landing that same 22” fish three times over the course of the summer, it was clear that the largest fish may be the hardest to spot during the trico fall.

The tricos would carry on through the summer into September. They were the staple. When thunderstorms would roll up the valley, the occasional PMD or baetis would bring up a fish or two as would the evening caddis. But nothing will ever compare to that first evening when I wandered on to the side channel just as summer kicked into full swing.

Postscript. Brings back memories of freshly turned legal drinking status, fly fishing daily, haunting the bars by night where beer, whiskey and flirting with the women were the order of the evening, alternating between spittin’ tobacco, smoking non-filter cigarettes, and who knows what else. Some good memories and some I just cringe at thinking about…

Hard Drinkin’ Whiskey Bar

Friday night, like the dust settling,

Where the creak of the barroom door,

Opens to a home of ice cubes,

Laying around, melting,

Collecting the heat of the day.

.

The whiskey might be poured

Mixed with the yawn of summer,

Sprinkled with laughter that tests

The little scratches along the bar.

.

Sunset reaches out like a voice

Tapping at the one tiny window,

Peering in the creaking barroom door

With a crooked welcome mat,

Worn, and tired with lifetimes of possibilities

that will languish on that last light.

.

Then the crickets sing,

Like jukeboxes across the sagebrush flats,

As the last working street light,

The life of Main Street, goes dim.

.

That’s when the fightwater gets poured.

And the doors fly open, letting loose

A roar across the desert,

Spewing the sad love songs,

They hoped would be sung together.

.

Not long after,

The last ice cube clinks silently

Along the half empty glass,

Calling for more. While the buzz

of an old street light struggles to life,

and a lone cricket remembers the words.

Just Great Days on the River

Late February, like it always seems to do, ushers in the bitter cold of arctic winter with snow all over. I don’t really recall wrestling with any “decision” this go ’round – I had a gathering to attend and the river happened to be on the way, along with snow, more winter, and the barest hint of spring given away by longer days and the buds of streamside willows. Dropping down into the valley, the horizon is sprawled with black clouds, streaking virga, and the intimate play of morning light across everything: somehow, the nastiest of the weather is not here, only suggested in the vistas of snowclad lowlands and restless looking skies.

The only decision is where. And I replay the fantasy of the long, slow bottom half of the Anderson run where the conditions seem set up for surface feeding fish, easy wading and the good promise of solitude. If not this fantasy then the riffle at the bottom is ever dependable. This is the piece of water that might take me five years to catch a fish in the way that I dream about on long, rainy coast-bound nights. I can always catch fish here, but there’s something about the “situation” that you find yourself catching fish in that makes it somehow intensely, cerebrally satisfying.

Let me jump to the punch line: it was on the minute I approached the water. But wait – even this takes some understanding. You see, these fish don’t give themselves away so easily. Oh sure, you’ll see a fish rise here, maybe there. But just stop. Stop, breathe, listen, look. Then it comes alive. The fish sip in emerging baetis or some other small, olive mayfly with gentle, purposeful, ultra-efficient movements. The biggest fish give themselves away with the flick of a very large tail barely slicing through the surface. Some fish work the edge of the moving water where the flow is easy. More fish delicately nose through the calf-deep shallows of the margins picking off bugs that wash into this forgotten realm. A few caddis take flight, the water is colored pewter with the black clouds painting an electric energy across everything. The fish, the bugs all seem to agree. There is a loud, urgent and anxious rhythm established when the bugs are emerging heavily, the fish are feeding and the weather is vibrating.

So it’s dream fishing – knee deep water, big, spooky trout, but not overly selective. Colorful, rotund rainbows that pull line from reels and make you want to talk in whispers like they might hear your cries of delight. One after the other. Later on, in early afternoon, the caddis emergence kicks in following a brief snow squall. A bald eagle watches from the top of a snag across the river – wondering who this curious critter is, on knees, hunched over in inches of water, casting to snouts and tails with intense abandon. Swaths of sun, rainbow, silver and gold color the scene. The baetis alternate with the caddis and at one point I just step back and watch the parade of bugs littering the water, floating silently down. Tails, snouts, splashes all add to the ongoing rhythm, uninterrupted by a flash of lightning and thunderclap.

I can’t say the “bar has been set” or “this is as good as it gets,” rather, this is the culmination of five years of work, patience and observation. I’ll be back soon, to find myself in an entirely new situation and reveling in the simple fact that it is bound to be different. It’s why I fish – if it were the same every time… well, that would be a different story, I suppose.

How Winter Wanes (A Corrolary Tale)

It was just the turn of your head,

Like the fields where we ran as kids

Tall, through the rolling grass

Skipping, hollering, laughing

endless imaginings!

That was when Springtime never ended.

.

Now we start it off again, here,

like then. Your eyes, your hands

Immersed in the window’s view,

Across the fields, to where the hills rise up

Collecting it all into the little streams

Reflecting in the midday sun.

.

Humming, softly in the warmth of that day

When we opened doors for the first time.

And in came light and breeze and linens swaying,

Entwined in a caress that never stopped.

.

And just as you turn again,

The faint scent of you, lingering.

I never remembered, until now,

like the stream where the oak trees grow,

The tiny home over the hill,

We don’t have to know anything more.

.

Nobody told me it would be quite like this.

.

How was I to know all the questions,

You look away, I wonder,

All of that was answered,

A long time ago. Nothing more.

I didn’t have to.

.

As children, we could study the

Long swoop of a single flower petal,

Seeing the landscapes rise and fall.

.

And in the one moment,

Your sure glance weaving a simple thread

Of lush green garden into my heart.

.

It has been a long time, my love.

.

All those things happened, then.

Now we turn, move into the place

Where the light fades from an afternoon

Sitting in the still air of an early evening.

.

That was your hello.

How Winter Turns to Spring (provisional)

The story plays out each time I crest the small hill

Especially in March with the first fresh winds.

That’s when this time is just like before

Any every past year at this time

Gets bundled up in this moment once again,

Somehow eluding time,

Or, strings those years together in one long now.

.

The truck rattles over the small hill,

While I still carry the sleep

That barely took hold last night.

One of those rare nights

The tossing and turning

Hoping to shake it off.

.

The thoughts coming as little sprouting flowers

Then roll over once more

To see them as festering memories

That won’t leave.

They come in on that breeze, maybe.

Just like last time.

.

That night the light rain dripped off the eave

Into the puddle by my window

Speaking in between all those thoughts

That can’t quite hear the steady rhythm outside.

.

Rolling down the hill, the day

Seeming like it could be the last

Feeling like maybe the first.

.

The day little routines go wrong,

Bringing a stutter step to the movements

In a day that rings in the last of that

Or ushers in the first of something.

.

This day rides on the hope of something,

This, or that, but really,

All the while,

The day just hovers in between.

Just like it always did.

It’s always just in between.

.

The early evening drive into town

The hum of the tires over the rough asphalt

Turning west,

Where the sun sprawls over the

rain clouds, painting a familiar picture

The colors announcing the last of the day

Or, maybe the first of something.

.

But never in between,

No idea of in between.

.

Like it just might be this,

One-more-time.

So that tomorrow might be the first or the last

Of something.

.

Yes, somehow, I skipped the in between

Coming over that hill this morning.

Forgot that it might be just like it always was

And always will be. In between.

Just barely,

In between.

Barely.